Building Men for Others: Living in a Fish Bowl

Being a police officer gives me a unique perspective on society. Being in uniform as I go out in public, I feel everybody staring at me not because of the kind of person I am. But for merely being in a police uniform.

It has taken a while, but I am used to the looks and the stares as people interact with me in the public. I had a Captain tell me once, "I want you to act as if a CNN crew was with you and your mother saw the video back at her house. Don't embarrass me and don't embarrass the Department."

I have taken that advice and never have forgotten it. Image is perception.

On game days, I allow our players to wear their game jerseys to school. It gives everybody on campus a look of who is on the team and it gives our players a chance to show the kind of men we are building here at Patrick Henry.

Until yesterday...

I received a phone call from Coach Martinez that two of my players were in a fight during lunch. It was compounded by the fact there were several other players that surrounded the two players and agitated the problem by creating a mob scene.

It turns out that the two players had a verbal dispute, a female student made threats that if they didn't stop, the players would get kicked off the team... High School drama. The two players went to mediation and I spoke to them. That has been dealt with. But the mob scene created by the rest of my players left a black eye on what we are trying to do.

I spoke to the players during 6th Period and I expressed by disappointment. I spoke to the team about how they were an extension of me. How when they wear the green and gold and they represent me, the staff, the school, the admin, their families and the alumni. And the image of all the players gathering around the verbal dispute left a negative image of what I am trying to do: Building Men for Others.

There is a lesson here. In real life, all it takes is a few bad apples to ruin it for everybody. So, I made a command decision that there will be no more wearing jerseys on game day until our team can earn my trust again. Everybody will be required to wear a pants, shirt and tie on game days. Show me you can act like a man then I will let you wear the jerseys again.

I know young people will make mistakes. That is why I love working with them be it in the schools as a police officer or as a coach and mentor at PHHS.

We all live in a fish bowl and everybody is looking. What do you want people to see in you?